Jingle Bells

Christmas is sometimes an embarrassment of riches.

The kids pretty much get everything the ask for, and then some.  We eat lobster for dinner and drink champagne for lunch.  Ray and I have trouble shopping for each other, because really, we want for nothing.

We are fortunate.  This figurative fortune is a result of my hard-working and clever husband who scratches and claws through a cut-throat industry every week so that we can have food on our table and clothes on our backs.  It's not lobster every day, and we don't wear designer stuff.  But we are grateful for what we have, and grateful for Ray.

He starts a new job with the new year.  The company sent him all his equipment to set up his office here.  Part of the ensemble is a fancy-schmancy VOIP phone for conference calls, etc that ties right into the company's phone system.  He even has his own toll-free number.  It has to run through our cable lines, of which there are none up in Ray's office, so that's another "Honey Do" project for him.  Until he gets that line run, the fancy-schmancy phone is in one of our main rooms.

It rings all day and all night.

"Can you shut that thing off?" I growled at one point.

Ray told me, he'd rather we heard it and went on to explain.  Turns out, the 800# that the company allocated to Ray they only recently acquired.  It previously had belonged to the government.

It was a Food Stamps hotline.

So, no.  We won't be turning off the ringer.  All Christmas Eve, and all day long Christmas Day, that phone would sit in the corner, quietly "jingling"  every hour or so.  Reminding us of our good fortune.  Reminding us that there are people out there who are calling about Food Stamps on Christmas Eve.

The kids would look up from their toys, sigh, and say "I feel bad."  I'd remind them of all the things they donated over the past year during the various charity efforts at their schools, the money from the "fun run", the canned food drives.  But still.

We do our part.  But we could probably do more.  I blithely send off stuff for "Toys for Tots," give my spare change to "Pennies for Ponies," generously fill a bag for every canned food drive, donate our "gently used" clothing to the CCA, drop some coins in the Salvation Army kettle.  But I rarely think about the people.  Every time I heard the "jingle" of that new phone, I tried to imagine a family in need.  How it would feel.

We all need reminding now and then.  While the "jingle bells" of that fancy-schmancy phone remind me to live in gratitude, gratitude is not enough - it feels selfish.  We need compassion.  We need to be remined that even on Christmas Eve, despite the efforts of what I believe is a fairly giving society, there are still people out there who don't just want, they need.  We need to do more.

The universe works in amazing and amusing ways.  I am grateful that my husband has a job, but the universe found a way to remind us through our good fortune the value of compassion.

I'm a Quitter!

I have once again joined the ranks of the unemployed.

I actually QUIT my job.

For an organization founded by MOTHERS, they have proven to be surprisingly inflexible about the demands of my personal life (read: motherhood).

Between the commute (= time + money), the childcare costs, and the fact that I haven't prepared a meal for my family in months, it just wasn't worth it. Most non-profits I've been involved with understand that the low pay means a certain amount of flexibility to manage your personal life in the most low-cost way possible. Not this one.

It's really too bad, because I liked the job a lot, and felt I was pretty good at it. Was told I was good at it too.

But alas.... they don't do telecommuting. They don't do part-time. They won't let me be a consultant.

Sigh.

My decision was reinforced this week twice. The kids come home to an empty house and have an hour or so on their own before they have practices, lessons, etc. w/ a rotating plethora of transport modes. Aidan came home to find his baby gecko (birthday present) dead. Called me sobbing hysterically and there was not a thing I could do. A few days later, Bridget got herself worked into a puddle of tears over the whole horse thing (being scared lately) right before her lesson. Again, not a thing I could do but try to calm her down and make a call to the riding instructor to warn her.


Sigh.


So....




Now I can:

• resurrect Fergus, my dormant sourdough starter and start baking fresh bread again


• finish stripping the wallpaper from Aidan's bathroom


• paint the guestroom


• cook fresh & healthy meals for the family


• get back to regular exercising


• invite people for dinner


• fulfill my carpool obligations

Now why can't I get paid for any of that???

Too crazy/tragic....

Nothing much to post, but didn't want y'all to think I'd died or something.....

Aidan's had a couple of baseball games this week, so Ray drops him at the field, returns home to manage Bridget's schedule, and I head to baseball directly from the office. Don't get home until late. Haven't had dinner with my family or time with them in days it feels like.

POSITIVE THOUGHTS..... Must think positive thoughts.....

• Um... I'm earning money?
• The kids seem to be surviving without me. Sad, in a way, but I guess it also means I've done my other job reasonably well.
• I have to shower more frequently?

Help me out here people. Anyone?

crazy tragic sometimes almost magic awful beautiful life

I guess my days (or weeks!) and the items that stick in my mind fall into one of two categories:

Angle of Repose

-or-

I love this crazy tragic sometimes almost magic awful beautiful life

If this makes no sense to you, scroll down and read my first blog post.



This week was definitely in the "crazy/tragic" category.



I've recently started working again and had to spend most of this week in New York. Between my trip, and Ray's adventures back home with the kids, there was a lot of crazy/tragic.



Ray's adventures included the repeated escape antics of Scamp. He has a girlfriend down at the neighbor's (Scamp, not Ray) and sometimes just decides she's worth it to endure the jolt of his shock collar as he leaves our property. We've noticed he does this a LOT more often when I am away. Hmmm.... does that mean that I am his mate and Sadie (neighbor dog) is his mistress? Who knows. Anyway, as Ray was chasing Scamp down High Road, he managed (long story) to break our neighbor's lock on their pasture gate (with the car - told you, long story). So, a trip to the store is in order to replace her pasture lock. He also had another neighbor send up an SOS for Kids Needing Ride To School. Another neighbor SOS for Car Won't Start, and another neighbor SOS for Stuck at Work, Can You Watch My Kids? Add in two nights of (more) Severe Weather with kids cowering in his bed (equals Lack of Sleep), the usual sports practices, Bridget having a Project due at school, Aidan's baseball game (our turn to bring snack - Red Bull, anyone?), and Ray's week to drive the Boy Scout Carpool. And he still managed to have the house clean and a nice dinner waiting for me when I got home last night. Love that man!


My week was far less crazy (maybe there is something to this Working thing after all?). It was a Damage Control trip as far as work was concerned, so while stressful, I love a good scary project. The bonus was I got to spend 2 great evenings at the (lovely) home of Ray's sister, Regina and her husband Rob. FINALLY got to meet my two little nieces there, Kailey and Lindsey. What fun!


Got stuck in the Great American Airlines MD80 Snafu on the way home but Continental stepped up to the challenge admirably and it was all accomplished with only about 7 phone calls and visits to 3 different airline counters at the airport, so I consider myself luckier than most. SOMEhow in that process (multiple flight changes, maybe?) I became a "security risk" and got the dreaded SSSS on my ticket. My favorite part of THAT whole process of the Confirming Of The Underwire Bra.


Note to self... no more underwire bras while flying.